I know people always wonder why I don't talk during class discussions and why I don't usually talk to anyone unless they talk to me first, I don't even have a real reason for it, I seriously just can't help it. When I go to talk in front of a class or just talk from my seat, I get extremely nervous (I have no idea why though because I couldn't give a crap about what people think.) and when I go to open my mouth and talk, I either can't talk, or I stutter really bad.
I would absolutely love to be able to join in with class discussions and express my opinions and beliefs about things, cause believe me, I have plenty, but I seriously just can't talk. I open my mouth and no words come out so I'm stuck listening to everyone else's.
I have really tried to talk during discussions and everything, it's not like I willingly choose to be as quiet as I am all the time. I know that sounds weird, but when the class is having these really good discussions, there is a silent war going on in my head and the shyness in me always wins. Like for example, in Mrs. Ladd's class, when we started discussing Life of Pi and the class was talking about religion and their beliefs and everything and I agreed with basically everything Madison was saying and I really wanted to add my beliefs to his and back him up kind of, but when I tried to open my mouth and talk, I couldn't.
It drives me crazy. It's not like I don't like everybody, I respect most people very much, I would love to be friends with everybody and be able to talk to them, but I can't help it. So, sorry.
1 comment:
Thank you for writing about something so personal to you. The fact that you are aware your shyness and you are working at it, you will overcome it. As you get older, you will begin responding and it will become more natural to you. You have to keep on trying.
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